Geeks + Gamers › Forums › Community Hub › General Discussions › Shoeonhead and Male Loneliness
I used to watch Shoe back in the day. At some point she turned socialist and I stopped watching. She still has good things to say about some stuff and still makes good points. But I dislike the whole anti-capitalism thing.
Anyway, she made this video below and not only do I believe she is correct but the response to it she talks about shows you the cause and effect.
Are men lonely? Is there a serious issue with male suicide and many other negative stats? ABSOLUTELY.
How did this happen? Feminism. What was a call for equal rights over decades morphed into men are bad and then it changed into it’s final form, we don’t need men at all. Don’t believe me? Watch Shoe’s video as she highlights all the women who told her exactly just that in those very words.
And anyone who says it’s “toxic masculinity” is part of the problem. What do you think that phrase was designed to do? And no, it’s not because men don’t show their emotions. Anyone saying that (and I hear women say it all the time) does not at all understand. We don’t show them because we don’t want to. Why don’t we want to? Because we are built not to. When sh!t hits the fan and very hard things, sometimes terrible things, need to be done if you are crying you are not getting done what needs to be and when a women sees a man cry she loses respect for him. Women have the luxury of being emotional, men do not. And NOTHING is wrong with that at all.
But, feminists made a critical miscalculation. What hurts men, hurts women, hurts men, hurts women. We are not islands, we are 2 halves of a whole and we need each other. And we each are made for certain roles. Men are made for sacrifice, women for nurturing. Both are absolutely critical. Those are indeed social constructs but only because they are biological realities. A man will straight up run at something deadly to defend his family and often others. And when he is wounded, broken and battered due to that, a woman will run to that man and as he saved her, she will save him and nurture his wounds. This is the way of the world.
For every lonely man, their is a lonely woman. You can tell each other you hate each other all you want but it does not negate the need we have for one another and denying that is how we get here where men and women are almost incapable of working together for happiness.
So we can understand we need each other, respect each other and live happily together creating families and harmony as has been the case for all of time prior to the last 30 years. Or society essentially ends in cats, box wine or beer and porn. Your choice.
If anyone reads the words I wrote above and wonders how could I say such things, how do I know?
Because I have lived it. I got married and was loving that, it’s what I always wanted. Then it went sideways for a number of negative reasons and my wife left (I was done very wrong but I played a part in that). That was a long time ago. Here I sit older and spiteful towards women to the point I do not trust any woman I do not know well.
What has that earned me? Being alone since and a guarantee I will die that way. Many of the things I wanted out of life I will never have.
Do you want that for yourself? No? Then stop hating.
Ya, I feel your pain man. I’ve been single for 13 or so years. I’ve been done wrong by women too. I always end up with lunatics. I give, but never receive. So, I quit trying to find someone. I’ll be 50 this year. I don’t have interest in drama or stress, at all. I get enough of that from work. I work nights and live in night shift, 10 & 1/2 hr shifts for a week straight, makes it even harder to meet someone. In fact, I just got home from work. I’m tired. Not interested in having to worry about appeasing someone else right now. lol.
I don’t hate women, at all. But, the “standard” that is “normal” now days in the dating scene it just wrong and something I wont participate in.
I would like to get married someday, but on top of getting a girlfriend I also have to get a job. I feel that both are harder to get nowadays.
I am your age, we are in the same place as far as that goes. I was burned bad enough such that I cannot allow myself to dwell on it because I begin to have evil thoughts that I know are wrong. That’s how I came up with something called the “3 Lists of Fire”.
Sometimes people tell me I should date and there are people out there you just have to try. Well, I am sure I can possibly find diamonds in a minefield but the chances are I just end up with missing limbs wishing I was dead.
I hope you do get married one day. But choose wisely and if you follow Christian doctrine on that it keeps you out of trouble in a big way. What people now consider oppressive standards are actually very healthy guidelines that set you up for success but it means people have to keep it in their pants so they ignore them.
But do indeed get yourself a job first. Prior to marriage and children you concentrate on yourself so you can offer the best you that you can. But once you get married you enter a partnership and once you have children your life ceases people about you.
Don’t listen to the world around you. It will tell you restraint is oppression and to serve yourself above all others and that is how you obtain happiness. People believe that and that is why they are miserable and hate themselves. Contentment is gained through doing for and loving others, primarily your family. Chasing brief periods of personal gratification is how you end up unhappy, confused and angry.
If you’re lonely it’s a good opportunity to do some introspection and take yourself to a better place.
Loneliness is like a kick in the balls. There is little in the way of self soothing that helps, you just have to let it pass.