REVIEW: Haunted Mansion (2023)

Movie Reviews

I saw Haunted Mansion this weekend. Coming out a week after “Barbenheimer,” I didn’t expect anything from this film, and I don’t think anyone else did, either. Pirates of the Caribbean notwithstanding, Disney’s theme park adaptations don’t tend to do well financially or critically. Besides, they already did a Haunted Mansion movie once before, and it was not good. I assume that’s why Disney has been trying so hard to bury the fact that this is a remake, despite proudly announcing several each year. This movie has a great cast, and the trailers seemed lighthearted and harmless enough, but it just didn’t have the wow factor to it. But it’s a Disney movie, and I’m one of the people clinging to the sinking ship, so of course, I had to at least give it a chance to surprise me. To put it mildly, it’s been a lackluster year for Disney, and the year is more than half over now. Is Haunted Mansion the miracle turnaround they need? Probably not, but let’s see if it’s any good. Grab your sage and astral camera, and we’ll go ghost hunting!

Haunted Mansion (not to be confused with The Haunted Mansion) is the latest cinematic attempt to cash in on one of Disney’s most iconic, timeless theme park attractions. This film stars Rosario Dawson as Gabbie, a mom at her wit’s end in a haunted house. Father Kent (Owen Wilson), paranormal investigator Ben Matthias (LaKeith Stanfield), history professor Bruce Davis (Danny DeVito), and medium Harriet (Tiffany Haddish) are wrangled in to help the little family before it’s too late. 

Before we go any further, I think it’s only fair that I confess to having no fondness for or attachment to either the Haunted Mansion attraction nor the horror genre. Despite growing up loving their movies and products, I’ve never been to a Disney park, so I know little about the Mansion itself. I saw the 2003 movie when I was a kid, but I thought it was dumb even then and hardly remember it. I mostly recall thinking Wallace Shawn and Terence Stamp must have been blackmailed into appearing. I never liked horror movies, especially modern-set ones, films about ghosts, or gruesome killings. I find horror the least human and relatable genre because a movie won’t scare me. I don’t know why, but they never have. If you write characters well enough, you can make me fear for their safety, but I’ve never understood the palpable, visceral dread they can elicit in others. So while a rare and special film like The Shining (I know, cliché choice) can win me over, I usually don’t watch them or go in with any expectation of enjoyment. I’ve seen some complain that Haunted Mansion isn’t scary or not frightening enough for them. This means absolutely nothing to me, and honestly, it was marketed as a Disney comedy for families that’s appropriate for most kids. I’m baffled that anyone went into this expecting to be legitimately scared. 

While I have little to no insight into the theme park connections in Haunted Mansion, there are a few fun little Disney references. In the beginning, we see a bunch of U-Haul trucks, and one of them features Dr. Facillier, the voodoo-wielding villain from 2009’s The Princess and the Frog, another New Orleans-set movie. At one point, a pianist in the background briefly plays “It’s a Small World.” These nods don’t necessarily make the film better, but more fun for people like me. Speaking of New Orleans, this movie has a very fun, jazzy score by Kris Bowers. I wish they leaned into the culture of the area more, as this was interesting to me (I’ve never been to Louisiana and always find it a fun setting,) and the history of the Mansion is at the root of the film’s conflict, after all. Give the movie more personality by delving into this unique setting Disney doesn’t deal with very often! 

With that being said, I’m not arguing that Haunted Mansion lacks personality, just that they could have added even more to spice up the experience. If there’s a reason to go see this movie, it’s the cast and their chemistry. I don’t have strong feelings for Rosario Dawson outside of my Star Wars-related inner turmoil, but she always delivers, and she’s fine here. Gabbie is the straight man out of the living Mansion denizens, so she’s the least interesting and funny, but it’s by default. Her performance does what is asked of her. LaKeith Stanfield is hardly a household name, but he’s an actor I’ve grown a steady appreciation and fondness for. He plays a lot of supporting characters, but he does it very well and brings an intensity to his performances that makes me curious about him. I want to see him in the lead, so I appreciate Haunted Mansion for really flexing his chops. As you’d expect, Danny DeVito is hilarious, and Owen Wilson is surprising as Father Kent; I’ll leave it at that. Jamie Lee Curtis and Jared Leto are solid in supporting roles, although Curtis comes in and out of a Russian accent, which confused me. Jennifer Tilly plays Madame Leota in the 2003 film, and I don’t remember an accent. Is Leota Russian in this interpretation, or in the theme park ride, if anyone knows? Her costume in the flashbacks supports this as well. Either way, love Jamie Lee, but pick an accent and stick with it.

The surprise stars of Haunted Mansion for me are Tiffany Haddish and Chase Dillon as Gabbie’s son Travis. These two performances don’t outshine the ensemble or anything, but they surprised me the most. Tiffany Haddish is harmless in small amounts, but I had no idea she could be this funny and heartwarming. I teared up twice in this movie, and one instance was because of a monologue she delivered. It wasn’t anything profound or life-altering; she was connecting with another character over grief and loss. I’m glad that Haddish and the writers both shocked me with this one. I’ve never seen Mr. Dillon before, and going in, I thought he looked goofy and like he was overacting in the trailers. This young man has perfect comedic timing and delivers more somber moments well, too. He could prove to be a solid performer as he grows up.

I do have some gripes; this movie is a fun experience, but not one without any flaws. There are a couple of performers here who are underutilized. This issue is surprising since the cast is this movie’s greatest strength. One performer hasn’t been credited in the trailers, so I won’t spoil it, but their scene was fun and could have gone on longer. It’s possible that wanting more is a good thing; plenty of movies are overlong, so I may be tempting fate here. However, Dan Levy has been advertised heavily in the trailers. Why is he only in one very short scene? His gag from the trailers isn’t even in the movie! I’m not a huge fan of his; I just find this choice puzzling. The biggest issue with Haunted Mansion is also something I enjoyed very much: the comedy. Again, much to my surprise, this movie is very funny, mostly thanks to the comedic timing of this very talented cast who work together like a well-oiled machine. The problem is that the jokes and even the style of speech are extremely modern. It screams “internet millennial humor,” which is fine; I tend to find that stuff funny, and again, it works here. The jokes are funny and well-constructed. But this aligns with Disney’s more recent films lacking that timeless feeling they once owned. This movie, in my opinion, won’t age well enough to show your kids in fifteen years or your grandkids in forty, etc. This may seem an odd critique, especially since it didn’t stop me from enjoying the movie. Disney flicks have just switched from timeless to timely, and I find a twinge of sadness in that. 

Haunted Mansion isn’t without its faults, but overall, I find myself stunned by all the good it has in it. This movie is funnier than the silly trailers looked, more adventurous than most contemporary Disney live-action movies, and sincerely touching in a way I never would have expected. It’s a personal decision whether it’s worth seeing in theaters or waiting for Disney+, especially if you have multiple children to pay for. But I had a much better time with Haunted Mansion than expected, and I think you might, too. I know this doesn’t mean much, but it’s way better than anything else Disney has crapped out lately.